Child of Destiny The Series: Holiday Seasoning

Child of Destiny The Series: Holiday Seasoning:  I'm without work for the next week or so and I'm just taking the time to rest, reset and rejuvenate. Weirdly enough, I've gotte...

All the Wishes Come True

 A fanfic in honor of the November 19th anniversary of Carry On

 

Prologue

“Dean.”

His brother turned around, a look on his face that Sam could not remember ever seeing; so free of worry and stress was it. His eyes crinkled in the corners as he looked at Sam, clearly delighted to see him.

Sam could barely move. He could hardly believe he was finally here. That he was seeing his brother again, in the flesh.

Well…maybe not in the flesh.

Dean reached for him, pulling him in and Sam just melted into his brother. Dean had hugged him many times and he’d felt the safety, the protection, yes, even the love – had known it was there. But this was different. This was like sinking into it, being enveloped and submerged in the essence of Dean’s love. Dean’s love for Sam.

Sam took a deep breath and just…breathed it in.

Finally. I’m home.

 

Chapter One

Sam closed the book he’d been reading and dropped it on the sand by his feet, contemplating the prospect of moving. His stomach rumbled and he looked down at it and then up at the cabin. The outside scenery looked a lot like Rufus’ cabin. The inside though was different. It had floor to ceiling windows and an open verandah area that opened out from the living room whose other three walls were floor to ceiling bookshelves. He could see Dean in the open plan kitchen no doubt making lunch.

He smiled, thinking that his brother was even better at reading his mind here in heaven than he’d been on earth. He looked out at the gently undulating sea and sighed with content. He didn’t know how long they’d stay here; once they left the bridge, they’d just driven, both savoring just being with each other. They didn’t talk much. Just drove and took turns staring at each other as if one might disappear if the other wasn’t vigilant.

Then out of nowhere, they’d come upon the ocean; the one they’d always been promising each other they’d go to.

Bare feet in the sand Sammy. Bare feet in the sand.

Sam laughed quietly to himself, recalling that Dean tended to put more than his bare feet on the sand. Skinny dipping was his new favorite thing it seemed and since the sand effortlessly rolled off those hard to reach places, there was apparently no reason why Dean shouldn’t indulge. He’d take a lap in the infinity pool that had materialized on their second day at this place and then run down to the beach to frolic in the water while Sam shook his head indulgently and made him toast and scrambled eggs for breakfast.

He’d cooked for DJ for most of his son’s life, yet cooking breakfast for Dean was something of a different pleasure. He hadn’t realized how much he’d missed it until he had it again. Dean would come in, just as the toast popped, a grin on his face, dripping water all over the hardwood floors.

He’d sit his bare ass down on the kitchen stool and chew his toast with his mouth open while Sam poured him coffee wearing bitch face number ten. Dean would give a pleased grin when he saw Sam’s face but there was not much talking before they’d gotten some coffee in them.

“Lunch, Sam.”

He looked up to see his brother approaching with a tray. He had on a pair of sweats but was shirtless and bare foot. A gun holster was still strapped to his thigh and for some reason, it wasn’t incongruous at all. Dean set a tray of burgers and fries in front of Sam’s daybed, with side of salad in the same motion as he withdrew his gun and turned.

He hit the giant dragon bird that had been swooping down straight in the heart and the thing imploded, disappearing into a black hole which closed up behind it. Dean twirled his weapon and holstered it before grinning at Sam.

“That was a big one.”

“Yeah, and did you see the fire it was trying to breath?” Dean shook his head, still grinning.

“You let it get close.”

Dean shrugged. “I had it. Saw it in my peripheral vision.”

Sam leaned forward, scooping up a French fry and dipping it in Dean’s home made sauce before putting it on his tongue and savoring the taste.

Like deep fried crack.

The thought didn’t come with a pang. Ruby was too many years behind him. He wasn’t that guy anymore. Just to make sure, he looked up at a still grinning Dean and smiled. “Where’s your plate?”

Dean sat down at the foot of Sam’s day bed and shrugged. “I wasn’t hungry. Had a heavy breakfast.” He patted his stomach and smiled at Sam.

This morning Sam had decided to make a short stack of pancakes and a plate of bacon for Dean. He’d been too distracted, watching him eat to eat much himself. He guessed that’s why he was hungry and Dean was full.

His brother reached down and picked up the book that Sam’d thrown down. “What’s this?”

“The Knights of the Round Table…you remember you used to read it to me?”

Dean nodded, looking uncharacteristically pensive. The Dean in heaven tended to grin a lot more than he had on earth. “I remember you telling me about it, when you were going through the trials.” He bit his lip, “Sammy, I mean you know-”

“I know. I know Dean. I promise.” He smiled at his brother, reaching out to squeeze his hand. “I know.” He whispered.

Dean looked down at the book, reading the cover. “Roger Lancelyn Green. Hmm, hey maybe you should check if he’s here.”

Sam cocked an eyebrow. “Here?”

“Yeah, like in heaven. Y’all can geek out together on book writing or whatever. Knights.”

Sam straightened. “Hey, that’s actually a great idea.”

“Well don’t sound so surprised. I have them occasionally.”

“But…I don’t wanna bother him.”

Dean dropped the book in his lap. “Hey, if anyone can write a polite note asking to geek out over something, it’s you.”

Sam threw the book at him. “You’re an idiot.”

Dean grinned. “You love it.”

 

Chapter three

Dean was out on a boat, in colorful shorts, slippers and a vest, fishing. Sam watched him from the verandah, smiling indulgently as he’d found himself doing a lot lately. He reached out and his laptop was in his hands. Putting it on the table in front of him, he googled Roger Lancelyn Green.

Thank you, Jack.

For a moment he felt a pang, missing his first son who he hadn’t seen since he’d disappeared after Chuck was vanquished. He’d felt him though, now and then, through the years, when getting through the night was particularly rough; when he’d wanted to just give up and give in, eat a bullet. Even with his second son to love and raise, living had sometimes been such a chore.

He bent forward, reading about the author. According to heavenly google, he was currently traveling through his stories, living them in real time and talking with his characters.

“That sounds like a good time if they don’t decide to run you through with a sword.” Sam murmured to himself.

“Who run you through with sword?”

He jumped, looking up to see Dean leaning over him. “Shit man, where’d you come from?”

Dean smirked, pointing at the sea. He held up his hand where he had two large fish dangling. “Caught us some supper and I think I saw the lochness monster.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, it was kind of circling the boat but then it just disappeared.”

Sam raised an eyebrow. “We going hunting?”

Dean bit his bottom lip, thinking. “Nah. I mean he wasn’t hurting anyone.”

“Yet.”

Dean nodded. “Yet.”

“Okay cool.”

“So what are you doing that’s gonna run you through with swords.”

The ‘over my dead body’ was implied in the set of his shoulders.

“Um, well I looked up Roger Green.” Sam turned the laptop so that Dean could see.

“Huh…”

“Yeah.”

Dean looked at him, “So I guess you wanna go off and join him.”

“No…I mean…” Sam shrugged.

Dean smiled. “You can go if you want.”

“I thought we were just gonna talk to him.”

“Yeah,” Dean shrugged, “But I won’t stop you if…”

Sam grinned. “Yeah, not going.”

“But you can if you want.”

“I know.”

Somehow they were in a staring contest and Sam wasn’t gonna blink first. His eyes began to water but still, he refused to blink until Dean did.

They both blinked at the same time.

“Why even do our eyes get watery. Aren’t we like, spirits?” Dean asked.

Sam quirked an eyebrow at the non sequitur. “Yeah well…why do we get hungry? Why do we sleep? I guess it really is mind over matter.”

Dean laughed. “And now you’re about to go down that rabbit hole ain’t ya?”

Sam shrugged one-shouldered, “Eh, maybe later. I’m actually gonna see if I can get in touch with Roger Green. I’m actually curious about why he would chose to have his heaven populated by his characters.”

“Dude. King George and the knights of the round table. Who wouldn’t want to hang out with those guys?”

Sam smirked at him. “Sooo…you wanna go check it out?”

Dean gave him a look. “Rude. You can’t just go barging into people’s heavens Sam.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Yeah, that’s why I’m sending an email first.”

“Yeah? And what’s he gonna do? Refuse?”

“Yeah I mean…if he wants to.”

“Or we could you know, just like…spy on him.” Dean waggled his eyebrows.

“Dude no.”

“Dude yes!”

“How even would we do that?”

“Isn’t that the fun part for you college boy? Figure it out. I’m gonna go gut these fishes.”

 

Chapter Four

Sam finally gave in and called Ash. If they were gonna set up some sort of spyware, there was probably no one he knew who could help.

I wonder if there are many spies in heaven. After all, they have to do some questionable shit.

Sam shook his head. He and Dean had also done a lot of questionable shit and here they were. While he waited for Ash to get back to him he decided to google spies. His jaw dropped open when his eyes happened upon one name.

“Dean!” he shouted.

He could hear the clatter of running footsteps and then Dean was skidding into the living room, gun in hand. “What’s happening?”

Sam gestured to him, “Come and see this!”

Dean glared at him. “You were screaming at me to come see something on your laptop? Really?”

Sam waved that away. “Come here!”

Dean sighed in a very put upon way and shuffled over to bend down and peer at the screen. “Delphine Seydoux?”

“Yeah! Remember her? From that time with the boat and the Nazis?”

“Yeah, when Lucifer almost killed you in Cas’ body. I remember.”

Sam gestured to the screen excitedly.

“So…what? Delphine is around?”

“Yeah.”

“And you were looking for her because…?”

“I was googling spies,” Sam murmured, blushing a little.

Dean gave him a sidelong glance before shaking his head. “I’m not even gonna ask. But just so you’re prepared, probably none of your serial killers made it up here.”

Sam hit him on the arm. “I know that, Jerk.”

“But you were still thinking about googling weren’t you?”

Sam glared at him. “Anyway, I’m not making much headway with the whole spy on Roger thing. So I emailed him, just to see if he would answer.”

“Did he?”

“Not yet.”

“Hence why you’re googling spies and serial killers?”

“I didn’t google serial killers!”

“Mmm hmm.” Dean straightened up, holstering his weapon and walking away. “I’m gonna go outside. Saw something animal like in the garden.”

“Is it a hunt?”

“I don’t know yet.” Dean opened the screen and went outside. Sam watched him a bit, anxious even though Dean couldn’t really be hurt on one of his dream hunts. Yesterday they’d spent the afternoon letting zombies chase them all over the beach before Dean cut off their heads. It was like a very slow game of tag; not that they’d played tag much when they were kids. Sam thought he much preferred the zombie version. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed so much.

“Sam!”

It was his turn to scramble out of his chair and go running. He skidded to a stop when he saw Dean, a golden retriever in his arms and the biggest grin on his face. “Look who showed up.”

Miracle looked up, his mouth open, teeth on display as if he was grinning at Sam. “Hey there.” Sam felt a pang as he met Miracle’s eyes, the early days of grief coming back to him in vivid detail. The despair. The debilitating black hole of sadness he’d been living in. He didn’t think he’d have survived those months without miracle to take care of.

“Hey buddy. How are you?” he reached out and scratched the dog under his chin. “Long time no see.”

Miracle licked his hand as if he understood exactly what Sam was feeling.

His eyes shifted and he met Dean’s, smile faltering slightly at the understanding he found there. His brother reached out and pulled him in, enveloping him in that essence of his love and allowing Sam to just sink into it as they squashed the dog between them.

Miracle barked in annoyance and they both burst out laughing.

 

Chapter Five

“I’m an idiot.”

“Yeah you are.”

Sam threw a sock at Dean. Dean dodged it, grinning widely.

“Why have you finally realized you’re an idiot?”

“I’ve been acting like we’re back on earth. Like I have to physically hack into this guy’s feed.”

“And you really don’t?”

“No, I don’t. All this crap around us, it manifests because we want it to.”

Dean looked around, nodding. “True. True.”

“Which, side-note, I have to say that I am blown away by your imagination when it comes to finding new creatures and ways to kill them. Like…dude.” Sam shook his head.

Dean grinned. “Thanks. I think I’d have made an excellent writer.”

“Ha! Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“You’re just jealous my imagination is better than yours.”

“Sure Dean.” Sam smirked. “Anyway, so I tried something. You wanna see or not?”

Dean came around to stare down at Sam’s laptop. “Sure.”

“So what I did was, I envisioned an app; kind of like Find My Friend that iPhone used to have?”

“Uh huh?”

“Yeah so then I downloaded it and…typed in Roger Lancelyn Green.”

“And, lemme guess; you found him?”

“Yes! I did. So then, I asked to friend him so that we could talk and he responded.”

“What?”

“Yeah.”

Sam hit a few more buttons and the screen came to life. A bespectacled bald gentleman came onscreen, his face serious, sitting on a bench in front of a wall of books. He smiled when he saw Sam. “Hello there again.” He called.

“Hey Mr. Green. This is my brother, Dean.”

“I said you can call me Roger.”

“Yeah.” Sam squirmed a bit in his seat, like he did when he was particularly excited. “Roger. This is Dean.”

Dean waved. “Hello.”

Roger waved again.

Sam was blushing as Dean watched him with a cocked eyebrow. “My brother used to read me your stories and uh…I just uh…I wanted to say thanks, y’know?”

Roger smiled. “You’re very welcome. Would you like me to read to you? Although I have to warn you, my characters might decide to drop by as I read their parts.”

Sam kind of skipped in his chair. “Yes please, sir.”

Dean snorted, shaking his head and moved away. He didn’t go very far, just enough to be out of the frame. He took a seat on a stool that appeared, at an angle that helped him to see the screen while not being seen. He looked from Sam to the screen as Roger read the story, hearing the clash of iron on iron as everyone from King Arthur to Lancelot showed up. The sounds of lovemaking as Guinevere and Lancelot made love.

“Ask him how come he doesn’t mind that they’re doing it right in front of him.” he hissed at Sam.

Sam turned to give him a side eye. “Ask him yourself. Why are you hiding over there?”

“I’m not hiding.”

Sam rolled his eyes and turned back to the screen.

“Yo! Sam! Ask him!” Dean hissed.

Sam sent him the middle finger and leaned forward, blocking his view.

Dean pushed his stool closer, pushing at Sam to move. The knights were sitting around the round table and Sam barely noticed as Dean moved him. They watched together as the story came to an end and Roger looked up. “That’s the end of that tale. Maybe I can tell you another one, some other time.”

“Yes please.” Sam said at once. His voice was unusually high. Dean turned to look at him and saw that Sam was no longer an adult but a four year old boy.

“Sam!” he croaked with fear and realized his voice was also quite high. He looked down at his eight year old self in horror. Sam turned to smile at him.

“Dean!” he leaned forward and put his head on Dean’s chest. Dean automatically wrapped his small arms around Sam. “Read me another story.”

Dean looked helplessly at the screen where Roger was still smiling softly at them. “Shall I tell you about how King George fought and vanquished the dragon?”

“Yes please,” Four Year Old Sam said, folding himself even more snuggly against Dean and sucking his thumb.

Roger began to read.

Leaning his cheek against Sam’s soft hair, Dean settled back in the sofa that had appeared beneath them, and listened to the story.

 

Epilogue

Dean woke up, still wrapped around Sam, but fully grown again. The sofa beneath them seemed to have stretched enough to accommodate their six foot plus frames. Sam stretched, wiggling and mumbling as he struggled awake.

Dean watched fondly as he finally opened his eyes, rubbing them as if he was still four.

“So…that was weird, huh?”

Sam blinked at him and then smiled. “Roger Green read us a bedtime story.”

“Yeah. I guess he did.”

Sam sobered. “Was that the first time anyone ever read to you?”

Dean looked away. “Course not. Mom used to read to me all the time.”

Sam just stared at him.

“Stop looking at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like you’re feeling sorry for me.”

Sam didn’t bother to deny it. Just blinked once and looked away. He stretched, his long frame curiously clad in the same pajamas as his four year old self. He got to his feet. “I’m gonna go cook you breakfast. What do you want? Pancakes?”

“Pig in a poke?”

Sam glared at him.

“Too soon?”

“Always.”

“Alright, I’ll have toast, bacon and Lucky Charms.”

Sam smiled. “Coming right up.”

He walked away and then stopped, came back and kissed Dean on the cheek, before pulling back and looking him in the eye. “I love you, Dean.”

Dean watched him walk away. Once Sam disappeared around the wall to the kitchen he looked back down and smiled. “Love you too, Sam.”

Aftermath.

 I can't believe I'm just sitting here not functioning, a lump in my throat...over a tv show.

Season 14: An Overview

Just reading my last post and laughing because at last, season 14 has switched it up. Not a single 'caught a case' has been uttered all season.
When season 14 began, okay first episode, wow, Sammy is tall when he's not standing next to Dean. Like whoa dude, calm down.

He literally brushes the ceiling or the doorway every time he was framed in one. It was super hot. Giant Sam Winchester is the shit. I see why Jared says he can't get into action movies because he towers over everyone. All the major action stars apart from the Rock and Chris Hemsworth are quite short. Like everyone around him looked like a midget, even Bobby who is quite tall.
That reminds of 'clowns or midgets?'
Sam's fears are funny.

Anyways, so the next episode was kind of super boring because ensemble cast. Like, the attempt is not working. It's boring when they try to make the story about other people. I do not - and I cannot emphasize this enough - give a flying fuck about Lucifer/Nick's story. Like bye felicia.
The only thing that saved it was the five minutes Dean was on screen. Otherwise so dismissed. Done. Cancelled. Mark Pedowitz is right, Supernatural is Sam and Dean. Let's not mess with that formula.
After that, well, things picked up quite a bit, maybe because Dean came home, maybe because it was just good. I loved all the stories. Kaia, the new and improved monsters, the halloween episode, even the one with the necromancer although I felt like the Sam and Charlie's storyline was tacked on at the end for some reason. And that human fly was the struggle. It was like they had different budgets for that part.

Also Sam and Dean or should I say Jared and Jensen are looking quite goodT these season. All rested and ready, and handsome as fuck. It's...enjoyable. Between season 10 and 12 I might have felt like we were holding them hostage in their jobs but now they seem quite content. Probably because they have more time off what with the attempt at an ensemble cast. So I'm gonna suck it up because...

I never expected to care about the return of John Winchester given that Jeffrey Dean moved way down my list of favorite people after his whole 'blue lives matter' schtick. But I am weirdly excited and I can separate John from Jeffrey. Also it helps that John is not exactly lovable. The poster for the three hundreth episode had me hyperventilating.
All in all, I am giving this season a straight up enjoyable grade.

A Letter to Andrew Dabb

There are certain things about supernatural that are for lack of a better word, annoying. Long time ago, in season one, two and three, actually four and five also; the first two minutes of the show weren't always the same. In fact, add six, seven, eight and nine to that tally. Somewhere around season ten, they started doing the same thing over and over which gets kind of monotonous. Dean wakes up in the morning, goes to the kitchen/library where Sam is sitting in front of his laptop. Then Sam says, "Caught a case."

He explains the case to Dean, Dean says but what about *insert big bad here* and Sam says "We'll catch a break but meanwhile let's keep moving, keep swinging..."
He doesn't even sound like he believes it anymore.
So then Dean says "Okay" and the scene cuts to the Impala speeding along the highway.
Interspersed of course with the MOTW characters getting killed.
Sigh.

I miss the days when every episode was different and they didn't have to tell each other to "keep moving, keep swinging," every episode. I miss when their roadside talks were really emotional and personal and gave insight into something. These days they just sound like platitudes. Are we pandering to somebody? Can we go back to storytelling?
I feel like we're losing the vision of what makes Supernatural great. We're losing the spark, sacrificed at the altar of fan service or whatever.
Can we please all remember who we are and what this show is about? Once the focus is lost, we will not last very long. 

Advanced Thanatology

Supernatural has something against shrinks and mental health institutions don't you think? This is the THIRD episode where bad things happen in one. There was Sam Interrupted, with wotisname and the wraith, then there was the Asylum where Sam went crazy and wanted to shoot Dean and now, this episode. I mean, I don't disagree. Asylums seem like miserable places and I guess the subliminal message might be 'just because I see things doesn't mean I'm crazy' right? But are they also maybe fostering stigma? I don't know.

Secondly, why is it that there is always some dumb kid wanting to get themselves killed by going into some haunted house at night? Like what is wrong with you white people? Have you not the sense Chuck gave you? there are easier ways to commit suicide.

Now, to episode specifics.
I thought Sam Winchester reading reviews for a strip club was just about the most hilarious thing to happen in this episode. I can just see him googling strip clubs, going to tripadvisor and clicking on reviews and deciding which is the best one to send Dean to...So OCD and methodical. This is the Plan to Make Dean Happy Again (aside: as if he ever was):
1. Let him eat whatever he wants.
2. Distract him with hunting.
3. Strippers and Burritos.
4. Keep Jack out of sight.
Sam doing his best to 'take care of' his big brother. So sweet. Also typical that he's failing miserably and Dean is just letting him think that it might work.
I saw on twitter someone correcting the writer of the episode that 'last Christmas' Sam and Dean were locked up by the Gitmo guys. But Dean didn't say I bought you a stripper 'last' Christmas. He just said it was Christmas. Much more likely it was season 11. They seemed a bit more carefree in the latter half of that season even with the darkness on their ass. However, I think they were dealing with the cage during that Christmas break soo...season 10? Maybe they celebrated the holiday after the got out?
Anyways, I am calling that scene my 'supercute Winchesters' moment of the episode.

Billie!

I just luh her. She has the most honey trickling over gravel voice I've ever heard. Also, she has the best lines. That whole, 'this universe can be poetic' thing, first of all, made me want to stand up and just give a standing ovation. It wasn't just the words, it was the delivery, the scene setting, her make up emphasizing her lips with every word. It was all so ominous and 'Dean is so screwed' ish. You could see by Dean's face that he figured he was screwed too.

Pet Peeve: supernatural fandom is exhausting and/or full of crazies. My Tumblr feed last week was FILLED with complaints about how "overlooked" Dean is. This week I see that the complaint is that this is the "Dean show" and "What about Sam?" 

Sigh.

So apparently the peanut gallery of #spnfamily was not happy that Dean got to tell the new Death all of his innermost feelings. 

"Why we gotta hear about Dean's angst?"

"Why is this the Dean show" and other subjective nonsense. Never mind that the whole scene was aimed at driving the plot forward. Oh no. Who cares about things like plot points and storylines? 

Anyways.

So Dean is super depressed and suicidal. Do we think Sam knows that? I think that he does. Sam notices everything about Dean; unlike Dean, he doesn't say so. He just acts according to his conclusions. And feeding Dean beer for breakfast and letting him be hungover and debauched just put me in mind of season 3, Sam, bending over backward for his brother who had sold his soul for him. Only this time it was more like 'if this is what it takes for you to remember who you are...'

Excited to see if Billie will be back.

Speaking of the rift, I wonder when Mary and Lucifer and the new Michael are going to make a reappearance...

Lastly and definitely least, Castiel is back. People are very excited about that. I really couldn't care less. Only because Destiel fans are always trying to twist things. They take all the enjoyment out of watching Cas. It's too bad because I get why they need him. but now it's just like, whatever man. Take your fans.

Brother Dynamics

Why is Dean so against Jack? I mean, apart from his parentage, Jack hasn't really done anything to earn Dean's ire.
So what is it?

I think Dean is trying to learn his lesson finally. He's trying to do what Sam wanted him to do at the beginning of season 11 and change the way they operate. I don't think he's on the "You and me we can get through anything" bandwagon anymore. Not because he doesn't believe but because maybe he thinks that the price they pay is sometimes too high.
They have lost a civilian (Kelly) Cas, their mother, and Crowley in an effort to get rid of Lucifer. Maybe it doesn't seem like the victory is worth the price.
But it's not just that.

The last time he took somebody at face value and let them in, Gadreel ended up using Sam's body to kill Kevin. And that must be forefront in his mind right now as is Sam himself. His father told him that Sam would go bad, that he'd have to kill him. But he resisted that notion. He spent so much time denying it and trying to prevent it, he probably blames himself for failing. For Sam opening the door and letting Lucifer out. And now look where they are...Maybe he's thinking he might have done things differently. Maybe if he had said yes, Lucifer would be dead.
But then again, so would Sam.
It's a conundrum enough to put anyone in a bad mood.
So maybe he's retreated to his most basic state: What Would John Winchester Do?
And maybe he's relying on Sam to make sure that he doesn't have to kill Jack while trying to remain detached enough to make sure he can do it if that's what it comes down to.